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#Inktober2018

#Inktober2018, Poems,

Inktober – Day 11: Cruel

Remember when I said I was hurt beyond recognition and built walls around my heart?
Entire friendships were sabotaged and I cut a lot of innocent people off.
Understand that I thought my emotions had played a really good part.
Emotions that had begun to fade and my feelings became arms bound with cuffs.
Little wonder I lost hope in finding light in places that looked like holes.

Keys? Yes, definitely. I had keys to my trapdoors.
With more exits than entrances to the maze I call my soul.
And even more sores that were overly guarded with shifting mirrors and caving floors.
My aim was to never repeat the same hurtful mistakes again.
Even with all the protection, you’ll never believe what was over the outer fence.

Qui Vive, Jasmine! Lookout for rain.
Umbrellas of unbelief; discarded. I am now drenched.
And someone has rekindled this dying flame.
Now I know you must be wondering who on earth this person is.
So I wrote this piece with hopes that the first letter of every line spells out his name.
Also, one thing I’ve learnt at the end is this:
Healing comes when you finally let go of the pain.

#Inktober2018, Poems,

Inktober – Day 10: Flowing

these hands:
these hands of yours
they create life
your heart beats the bass drum
and
your fingers follow suit
by plucking string after string
chord by chord
you breathe life into our ears
it’s this life that charges our souls
it’s how we remember experiences we’ve never had
it’s what makes us find solace
in a noisy world
every note telling a different tale
every word you breathe
rams into us
like current from a river
you’re a wave
that is pure
it is true
it is alive
and
it flows from you

#Inktober2018,

Inktober – Day 9: Precious

How do I tell my child that the moon, sun or other celestial bodies don’t follow us home at all? His image of his mother would be tarnished forever and I do not want to be the reason for that.

He still asks for her at night. These days he sleeps in my bed because “Mommy didn’t come to chase the monsters away.” I tell him to pray for her. I tell him she said she loved him before she died. I hear him when he’s alone. He pretends to talk to her.

I also think of her sometimes. I try to make up excuses so I can come to terms with why she left us – why she left me. I still don’t understand these things.

It’s been eight months and three weeks since she married Ade. Her friends usually come around to console me but they leave pieces of my heart and their clothing on my bedroom floor. Teni is different. Teni used to bring me food before she started coming to cook on weekends. She tells me I’m a good man, then she cleans my littered floors. I like to think my heart likes being touched by her. She’s the only one that knows how to fix me.

Bolu still calls her ‘Mommy’s friend.’ I wish he’d drop the title. It makes me feel awkward. I can tell she feels the same way too.

She hasn’t told me but I know she would rather have one out of the two names.
Will it be ‘Mommy’ or will it be ‘friend?’

#Inktober2018,

Inktober – Day 8: Star

The stars glittered relentlessly overhead.

He looked at the time and smiled at me. We had been outside for two straight hours now. I threw my head back and made to lay on the grass. He rolled his index finger around mine, took a breath and sighed.

“Do you know that I love you?”

“Mfa.” I grabbed his hand. “I know these things.”

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